What is God teaching you?

That was the question at Hub Group last night. I didn't answer it, partly because I was feeling kinda crummy and my brain wasn't working properly... partly because it had been a few weeks since we'd had Hub Group and the people (in that setting anyway) around me looked a little like strangers, but mostly because that's a HUGE question... not one that's real easy to answer on the fly, so I wanted a chance to think about it.

I was going to say that I'm not sure God is "teaching" me anything right now... because the first thing I think of when I hear "teach" is theology... new ideas... concepts... etc. And I don't think I'm really learning in that way right now. However, the more I think about what God is doing in my life, the more keenly aware I am that He is indeed "teaching" me pretty constantly right now. And I'm happy to say, I do believe I am learning at the same time!

God is ministering to me right now at this time in my life. He is caring for me. He is healing past hurts and teaching me about who I am in His sight... which is teaching me to deal with present hurts and empowering me to feel capable of handling future hurts. Life is not easy and Christianity does not = immunity.

At the same time He is ministering to me, I also feel Him teaching me how to minister to others, which is really exciting to me. I have always enjoyed helping people, but the past several years of "Churchianity" have left me feeling needy and broken and useless. So it's cool to feel like He might use me to do something good and worthwhile again. I feel hopeful that the future holds a place for me, however small, to be the church to Jesus (what we think of as the world).

He's teaching me to be brave. But He's making me see how impotent I am without Him. He's teaching me to stand taller, but He's making me humbler. He's teaching me to trust Him more and myself less. He's teaching me to believe in miracles and to see them where they might not seem so miraculous to anybody else... like in my own life, a regular person getting closer to Him and learning to be who I am.

There's this song I listened to this morning... You can find the lyrics and listen to it HERE That is so my life... and the miraculous thing is that it's your life too, I'm sure of it. Don't fight Him anymore. Don't be afraid to go to Him. He loves you especially.