When my husband asked me to marry him, I responded with "Of course! What are your plans for tomorrow?" Three years later, no thanks to my many many failed attempts at harassment, we finally tied the knot in a fairly traditional, family-approved wedding. It was great, don't get me wrong. I was married at the end of the day! But I would have liked to have gotten married the day after the proposal, taken a year off school and traveled across the country, guitars in hand... poor and in love... sigh.
Waiting is not something I do very gracefully. I want to be patient, calm, cool and collected... I really do. But truthfully, I haven't ever put a lot of effort into really attempting it. I guess it's about time.
I think maybe a curse of being a "creative" person is that you always want things to be exciting. I mean, people don't write books or sing songs about doing laundry, dishes, sweeping the floor and then sitting in car-line for 30 minutes every afternoon. Maybe they do, but I certainly wouldn't buy a book or listen to a song like that!
I think I need to start seeing the things God sees as big deals, as big deals. I think God sees training my kids as a really big deal. I think He sees taking care of my house and supporting my husband as really big deals. I think I've known all along what He's wanted me to do and I've been ignoring Him... hoping for something more fun, more exciting, easier, or just more immediately rewarding. I've been really dumb. I haven't listened. In fact, I haven't even asked "the question" directly, because I already knew the answer and didn't want the responsibility.
It's not going to be easy, but things are going to change.
Proverbs 9:10 (Amplified Bible)
10The reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord is the beginning (the chief and choice part) of Wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight and understanding.
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