Maybe it was brave...

So I went to the doctor yesterday, Allen and Clayton in tow.  It went really really really well.  I successfully played dumb and just casually and unemotionally listed the symptoms I am dealing with.  Allen confirmed and gave detail.  We laughed, we joked, we made small talk.  We were at the mercy of the extreme and almost god-like knowledge of the medical profession... (ok, not really, but we pretended to be... and I think we did a good job at it).

The doctor thinks he knows what is wrong with me.  Really strange.  In fact, he wrote the name of it down on a little prescription pad thing and handed it to Allen (I told him I didn't want it) and told him to look it up on webmd.com... Isn't that weird?  It's called Myasthenia Gravis.  From what Allen and my mom read about it, it's an autoimmune disease that attacks some kind of receptor thing in the muscles?  So as Allen explained, it's like there are too many phone calls and not enough answering machines... So signals are going from the brain to the muscles and the muscles aren't getting the message...  He is doing something to check if I have a tumor(s) in my thymus gland.  Apparently this is something that can go along with Myasthenia Gravis and could perhaps explain why I've been having sore, swollen throat and coughing in the evening.  There are lots of other things, but I'm kinda tuning them out for right now.  If I actually get a diagnosis, then I'll do some looking into it.  I should hear back about some blood work he ordered in a few days, and I go to see the neurologist in mid-April.  I'm a little sad that he didn't prescribe something for the pain that I'm having, so if anybody reading this wants to pray that this "episode" will end that would be fabulous.

Oh and he's checking for some other things too... all of which I'm not sure, but I know he said Lyme disease (I grew up in OH) and Epstein Barre virus.

Should be interesting.  I actually feel very positive about this round.  I have been dealing with this for about 3 years or so.  Round one proved I was not having strokes or seizures and probably not MS or Meneire's disease (an inner ear disease), and Round 2 confirmed no MS, but brought up the possibility that I was having "silent" Hemiplegic migraines and even the question of Fibromyalgia... Now here we are, nearly 2 years from my last Dr appt, and I guess some of the symptoms that I am having are starting to point to an actual diagnosis.  Oh how I would love to just know.  To be able to say with confidence--- See!  I knew I wasn't nuts!-- See!  I would never make all this crap up... That has been the hardest thing for me through this... worse than the pain or any of the other symptoms... is feeling sometimes like those closest to me don't believe me or think I'm crazy.  I hate that it has to be a doctor that convinces them, but if that's what it takes, so be it.  I'm trying not to get my hopes up, but I almost can't imagine having a name for this thing, an explanation for people and a way of coping.  I can't help but feel hopeful.