Easier said than done!

I have been running across a lot of things in the Bible lately that are definitely easier said than done. They're not things that are big news to me... like I haven't heard them before or anything... But you know how certain things just jump out at you at different times in your life? Yeah, I'm seriously glad that God is not done talking to us in this day and age. I have a lot to learn!

So what I've been doing is reading through our church's "family commitment" and reading through passages in the Bible that deal with the different issues/beliefs/commitments it highlights. Kind of researching things in case that is something I want to do in the future...

It has been interesting. Some things I thought I would have a problem with, I don't have a problem with. Some things I wish I didn't have a problem with, I do have a problem with! And when you have a problem with something... especially in regard to the church, isn't it great when you can find a neat, tidy little Bible verse to support your stance and blow the other guy out of the water? lol. Yeah, I really did used to think that way... I'm not proud of where I am. I am THANKFUL. My life, especially my "church life" has been a humbling experience. And I am grateful to God that I can say my first instinct (after the fear faded!) with this contract of sorts, was to ask Him to show me how to change how I feel so that I can continue to grow and become more mature.

So here's a breakdown of the commitment:

*Love the family- this is the most important. Healthy families love each other.

*Be in relationship- Be connected in a Hub Group

*Support the mission with my time, talents and resources- Praying for Hub City, Attend gatherings faithfully, Serving by doing what needs to be done, Giving

*Preserve the unity of Hub City- No gossip, Following the leaders as they follow Jesus

Pretty simple. Fairly universal as far as Christianity/church life goes. Not anything too controversial. And for the most part, pretty easy for me to align myself with. EXCEPT for one minor issue (which really is not all that minor!)

Here is a little of what I have been reading about *Following the leaders as they follow Jesus*:

1 Peter 5:1-7 reads:

I have a special concern for you church leaders. I know what it's like to be a leader, in on Christ's sufferings as well as the coming glory. Here's my concern: that you care for God's flock with all the diligence of a shepherd. Not because you have to, but because you want to please God. Not calculating what you can get out of it, but acting spontaneously. Not bossily telling others what to do, but tenderly showing them the way. When God, who is the best shepherd of all, comes out in the open with his rule, he'll see that you've done it right and commend you lavishly. And you who are younger must follow your leaders. But all of you, leaders and followers alike, are to be down to earth with each other, for-- God has had it with the proud, But takes delight in just plain people. So be content with who you are, and don't put on airs. God's strong hand is on you, he'll promote you at the right time. Live carefree before God, he is most careful with you.

Hebrews 13:17 reads:

Be responsive to your pastoral leaders. Listen to their counsel. They are alert to the condition of your lives and work under the strict supervision of God. Contribute to the joy of their leadership, not its drudgery. Why would you want to make things harder for them?

I can find lots of information outside the Bible which tells me this last point that I take issue with is unnecessary, or even un-Biblical. I've actually read A LOT of it... And that kind of writing brings me instant relief! LoL. BUT God tells me what he thinks about it in his Word. That doesn't really make it any easier to DO, but at least I know what I'm looking at...

Now round about the time I had finished reading these two passages and various others like it... several times... over the last couple of weeks... I noticed a statement at the top of this "family commitment."

It reads: At Hub City we will never ask our family to do more than the Bible clearly teaches.

Now I don't know why I didn't see that little sentence before... Perhaps because I had my defenses up and was looking for trouble... Maybe because I am just a little bit on the oblivious side at times... It IS time for me to get my eyes checked again... anything's possible! But it seems to me that that statement changes everything. It means that "I" know what I am supposed to do. AND "They" know what they're supposed to do. Ultimately (like in other relationships within the church and even marriage) I have to decide to do what God wants me to do, having some faith that they will do what they're supposed to do. If they don't... well I guess that's where the whole "being down to earth with one another" might come in... I also read in another part of the Bible about the difference between trust and gullibility... the knowledge of which may have come in handy in some of my previous church experience! There is no merit in being an ignorant sucker! LoL. But I can also tell you woe to those "leaders" who dared to take advantage of immature Christians. God is very clear about that in his Word as well.

So. What's it all mean?

???

I dunno... but I do. As far as the uncertainty of life, the unpredictability of people, and the possibility of being hurt... I really have no idea whatsoever. But at least I know where God is and that I can live carefree before Him because He cares for me. Do I HAVE to know anything else?

What are you searching for? What is uncertain in your life? What are you afraid of?

What does God have to say about it? You can trust him. I can trust him. When everything else falls apart, He stands. When everything else is uncertain, He is sure. I can tell you without a doubt that there is no better place to be broken than in the sight of the only One who can put you back together again. I am glad to be there!

A Few Things...

1. I need to practice.

2. I'm not so much interested in the same things I was when I was in my late teens/early twenties... but those songs made for some amusing reliving of those days!

3. I still like the feel of my fingers throbbing from playing too much.

4. I need to get some chords from online so I don't waste all my time trying to figure out how to play songs.

5. I miss the days when music was my life. But, I'm hopeful that God can bring all this mess together somehow and that it can be worked in here and there without too much trouble.

Conclusion: It was a good day and I've been stupid to throw out all my loves. Gotta right that wrong : )

I'm thankful for a creative God. And that he has a healthy sense of humor!

Music Therapy

I did A LOT of driving today. About 5 hours worth. With 2 screaming toddler boys in the backseat of a small car. I had the music up really, realLY, REALLY LOUD. LoL.

Listened to some great, soulish, raw and expressive music and it really inspired me! Tomorrow after I get Christian to and from his eye doc appt., I'm getting out my beautiful guitar and a book of homemade unfinished songs... and I'm just going to spend some time being creative.

You know, God made me in His image. He is a creative God. I'm hoping to draw on that a bit in the coming days. I've been missing music in my life. And I've been mourning a loss of creativity. And there's really no good reason for me to let that continue is there?

Mature in this Oneness...

I feel like I've blogged about this subject before...

I was reading this passage this morning and it just blew me away: (emphasis mine)

John 17:20-23 (The Message)

I'm praying not only for them

But also for those who will believe in me

Because of them and their witness about me.

The goal is for all of them to become one heart and mind---

Just as you, Father, are in me and I in you,

So they might be one heart and mind with us.

Then the world might believe that you, in fact, sent me.

The same glory you gave me, I gave them,

So they'll be as unified and together as we are---

I in them and you in me.

Then they'll be mature in this oneness,

And give the godless world evidence

That you've sent me and loved them

In the same way you've loved me.

I don't know how many bazillions of times I must have read this in the past... but I don't think it really ever meant much to me.

To paraphrase a paraphrase (lol):

Jesus is praying for us and everyone that will eventually come to him. He says that his goal is for all of us as The Church to be unified, to be of one heart and mind, 1st with eachother, which will in turn facilitate The Church's being of one heart and mind with God. AND that the ultimate outcome of that is that the world will believe The Gospel! They will believe that God sent his son for them... That he loves THEM the same way he loves his Son!

I am sad right now and a little overwhelmed, but also in awe of the power which God gives to His Bride, The Church... It's so amazing. It's so hard to be unified. It's so hard to submit to other believers, to be open and vulnerable with them, to teach them and learn from them, to listen and agree, to stand up for what's right, but to back down from the unimportant for the sake of oneness... This is all of our relationships within The Church! (and maybe even with the world) It's hard to believe that with that kind of maturity (disguised as weakness and humility?), the world sees Jesus in us... and believes that our Savior LOVES THEM.

What are we saying to the world when we are not unified? When we fuss about stupid stuff... minor little issues and points of contention that let's face it, just don't matter at all... When we try to one-up each other, or undermine each other, or when we flat out ignore each other?

No wonder so many people have a hard time thinking Jesus is legitimate and loves them. No wonder I've had a hard time with that! lol. What an enormous responsibility... and to think He's speaking of how to live our whole lives... I just can't believe I never saw this before.

I love how God is waiting and ready to water the flowers just as the ground is starting to get a bit dry and they wave their little wilted leaves at Him.

I am completely unworthy.

And utterly lucky.

To be in the shelter of my Father's arms

protected from the lightning that comes from those same Hands.

So Beautiful

I have been told, by a very wise woman and dear friend, that it's ok to change my mind.  That's pretty nifty if you ask me, yet another act of Grace. 

I'm reading this book by Leonard Sweet entitled So Beautiful: Divine Design for Life and the Church.  It is life-changing.  It is full of stuff that rings true in my Spirit, but never experienced, at least not until recently.  I've been reading about the relational aspect of Christianity and that is what has really challenged and encouraged me to change my mind about a relationship in my life... to choose to love sacrificially and vulnerably, mindful of how people and Jesus have loved me in all the messiness that is my life.

Here are some quotes that have really hit me hard the last couple of days:

Relationships don't come to us like Christmas packages, all neatly wrapped with ribbons and bows.  Relationships come more to us like an abused package from the post office: ripped, torn, its guts spilling out, the contents often broken. (pg 138)

Being right--having the best arguments, compiling the most evidence, even living in exemplary consistency with one's beliefs--does not always make a person right. (pg 137)

...my friend James Davis came up with a saying:  "A faith that hasn't been tested is a faith that can't be trusted."  Grace under pressure is a test of leadership. (pg 133)

The turning point in every person's life is what answer we give to Jesus' question ["Who do you say that I am?"]. (pg 127)

Jesus is the Truth... not just the truth about God, but more accurately the truth of what it means to be fully human. (pg 120)

True freedom brings others into the light and makes them free.  True freedom is the fitness to feel responsible for other people's captivity and inaction. (pg 114)

I'll be blogging more about this book in the coming days as I finish it up...  but WoW.  This is a book that cuts straight to the heart.  I am amazed with Sweet's sensitivity and encouragement... but also with his boldness and the power behind his exhortation.  So Beautiful is definitely blowing some of my old favorites out of the water with it's full picture of the heart of God/ lived out through The Church... 

Wash/Be Washed or Die.

I've mentioned before that I am doing a study by Beth Moore, entitled A Woman's Heart, God's Dwelling Place:  An In-depth Study of the Old Testament Tabernacle.  I am finishing up week 4 of 10, and while I still cannot decide with certainty if I really like the style of the study, I am learning a lot and I really enjoy that I am reading all over the Bible and that I have a guide for what to do each day.  It's been nice.  If anyone has any suggestions for other authors who do this kind of daily study (something that would take between 30-60 minutes each day), I would love to explore a bit.

So today some things caught my attention.  A while back, while preparing for Passover, I read about how Jesus washed the feet of the disciples.  I always kinda understood that as a demonstration of servanthood... and it is for sure.  But it seems like there's a bit more to it than that that the Jewish people would have understood.  

Today I read in Exodus about the washbasin used between the Tent of Meeting and the Altar.  It was made from the polished brass/bronze mirrors (1 Cor. 11:28) the women workers had donated as a freewill offering for the building of the Tabernacle and was for Aaron and his sons to wash their hands and feet in.  The verse (Exodus 30:19-20) reads:  Aaron and his sons will wash their hands and feet there.  They must wash with water whenever they go into the Tabernacle to appear before the Lord and when they approach the altar to burn up their special gifts to the Lord-- or they will die!

If you read in John 13, you find the story of Jesus telling the disciples that in order to be part of what he's doing, they need to let him wash their feet, and then go and do likewise.  AND that it will be clear what he's doing later on.  Later we read about the blood and the water coming out of his side as he dies on the cross...  which coincides with the blood from the altar and the water from the washbasin...  An interesting sidenote is that with his last breath, he says "It is finished," which according to Hebrew writings is what the priests would call out to the people when a sacrifice was made.  

Gosh, I really feel like I can't go all the way into this or I would be penning a book... There is so much God's word has to say about washing, being clean, letting Jesus make us holy, etc.  Perhaps I shouldn't have started this without being able to finish it neatly...

I guess the biggest thing I got out of my reading today is the need for us to ALLOW Jesus to wash our feet, make us pure, to get under that cleansing stream of blood and water that was offered freely.  We didn't have to put our hands on the lambs head as in the O.T. sacrifices... God did that for us and took our guilt on himself.

AND that we need to wash each other's feet, because that's what he did for us.  I have a vague idea of what that looks like.  I think maybe I'll look at this a bit more in depth in time.  Jesus washed the disciples feet, something they normally would have done for themselves as an act of servanthood... However on a much deeper level, he was offering himself as a sacrifice, that they didn't have to offer sacrifices for themselves anymore...  Can we do that for each other?  I think we can.  I think we can wash each other with The Word...  We can sacrifice ourselves to really love someone...  

I love that God's Word is so simple... and yet a mystery.  It keeps me humble, and keeps me hungry.  

P.S.  Something else that just occurred to me... there is a flow of water and blood associated with birth.  Just a thought, something to ponder...

Wasn't God bored???

I had an interesting "conversation" with Cassidy, my 8 year old yesterday.  Out of nowhere she says something like...

 "The Bible says that before God made people there was nothing... but it also says that God was always there, that he was never born like a baby...  What did he do forever before that?  Wasn't he BORED?"

I thought it was funny.  I answered with something very insightful... something along the lines of "I don't know..." and the conversation turned to a discussion about snack food and why bicycles get rusty.

But it is interesting isn't it?  We view everything in relation to US.  Like, Man, how could God possibly have kept himself occupied without US around to entertain him? LoL.  I think it's super cool though that kids don't have all the religious "boxes" we as adults do.  They are able to think up the most unanswerable questions.  That's great for reminding us that we're really all kids in the grand scheme of things.